Thursday, December 31, 2009

10 years ago

There is a meme on twitter right now, #10yearsago.




This, well, it gave me pause, an epiphany-type moment. What I didn’t realize on December 31, 1999, was how much my life was about to change. I was aware in some obvious ways. I had just quit my job in Advertising and, in the New Year, was starting a new job and a new career in recruiting. I was in the midst of a messy, complicated break up. And I was contemplating a move out of the house I was currently living in.

What I didn’t know, what I couldn’t know, was that that was only the beginning. I had no concept of how different my life would be in only a few short months, and certainly within a year. Because 2000 was not only the year I started a new career. It was also the year I moved to New York. A move I wasn’t planning on and wasn’t expecting. It was a move that shaped my life in ways I couldn’t expect. A move that affected me, not only in terms of my day to day to life, but also shaped who I’ve become.

At the end of the 90’s I was looking back on a decade in which I graduated from High School, went away to college, graduated from college, fell in love for the first time, fell in love the second time, fell in love for the third time, lived on my own, started a career, made my first “adult-life-after-school” friends, become an adult (even if whether or not I’m effective at it is still debatable).

My memory of the end of the century was all the Y2K mania (seems so naïve now doesn’t it?) and forging into a new century, that I didn’t truly contemplate all the transitions and transformations that I (and my life) had been through in that decade.

I knew and expected that there would be changes to come. But I did not see or expect that changes that did.

It’s been quite a decade. There has been a lot of loss in my life, a lot of sadness, especially in the last half of the decade. But I’m remembering now that there was a lot of joy.

Lately I’ve been very sad, very frustrated with my life. I’ve been treading water in a mild depression. Frustrated with so many things. But for the first time, looking back at what I had no idea was in store for me ten years ago, gives me hope, optimism and even enthusiasm. I’m excited to see what the next decade has in store for me. All the things that I can’t even imagine, couldn’t even predict, have no idea that are about to happen to my life.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Goodbye to the Aughts

Before Christmas I started to draft a decade retrospective blog entry. A listing of the things I said goodbye to in the last decade. Things like an answering machine, a landline, DC, New York, and people lost. I had envisioned it being part nostalgic, part sentimental, part, sad, part funny.



But seriously, just the number of funerals that I went to in the past decade, was depressing. (btw, that number is 7). I just couldn't lighten it up enough.

Rather than a quippy retrospective, this is what I have:

In sum, the past decade, I switched careers, moved to NYC, entered my thirties, switched careers again, moved to Chicago, did some traveling (Spain, Morocco, Italy, London, Dublin), had some boyfriends, made some friends, lost some people, had some stories published, grew to appreciate my family (and the few really amazing friends that I have known for decades) and their love.

It is time to say GoodBye to this decade.

I'm ready for the tweens.

update: I forgot to add, started a blog.

Friday, November 20, 2009

Things said in my office

Overheard, the President talking to the Director of Operations:

It's like we're working with a proctologist.

My VP, speaking to me:

Woman of a certain age are always talking. Older woman, fifty-five and above. Not at your age. At your age they just look good. Well, for another year or two.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

‘With all due respect, ma'am, you can go jump off a bridge.'

This story gives me hope for, well, our culture, kids today, and the eventual chipping away at prejudice in our society. Oh and that the constitution and the ideals on which is was founded are still kicking ass.


A boy and his flag

Will Phillips isn't like other boys his age.

For one thing, he's smart. Scary smart. A student in the West Fork School District in Washington County, he skipped a grade this year, going directly from the third to the fifth. When his family goes for a drive, discussions are much more apt to be about Teddy Roosevelt and terraforming Mars than they are about Spongebob Squarepants and what's playing on Radio Disney.

It was during one of those drives that the discussion turned to the pledge of allegiance and what it means. Laura Phillips is Will's mother. "Yes, my son is 10," she said. "But he's probably more aware of the meaning of the pledge than a lot of adults. He's not just doing it rote recitation. We raised him to be aware of what's right, what's wrong, and what's fair."

Will's family has a number of gay friends. In recent years, Laura Phillips said, they've been trying to be a straight ally to the gay community, going to the pride parades and standing up for the rights of their gay and lesbian neighbors. They've been especially dismayed by the effort to take away the rights of homosexuals – the right to marry, and the right to adopt. Given that, Will immediately saw a problem with the pledge of allegiance.

"I've always tried to analyze things because I want to be lawyer," Will said. "I really don't feel that there's currently liberty and justice for all."

After asking his parents whether it was against the law not to stand for the pledge, Will decided to do something. On Monday, Oct. 5, when the other kids in his class stood up to recite the pledge of allegiance, he remained sitting down. The class had a substitute teacher that week, a retired educator from the district, who knew Will's mother and grandmother. Though the substitute tried to make him stand up, he respectfully refused. He did it again the next day, and the next day. Each day, the substitute got a little more cross with him. On Thursday, it finally came to a head. The teacher, Will said, told him that she knew his mother and grandmother, and they would want him to stand and say the pledge.

"She got a lot more angry and raised her voice and brought my mom and my grandma up," Will said. "I was fuming and was too furious to really pay attention to what she was saying. After a few minutes, I said, 'With all due respect, ma'am, you can go jump off a bridge.' "

Will was sent to the office, where he was given an assignment to look up information about the flag and what it represents. Meanwhile, the principal called his mother.

"She said we have to talk about Will, because he told a sub to jump off a bridge," Laura Phillips said. "My first response was: Why? He's not just going to say this because he doesn't want to do his math work."

Eventually, Phillips said, the principal told her that the altercation was over Will's refusal to stand for the pledge of allegiance, and admitted that it was Will's right not to stand. Given that, Laura Phillips asked the principal when they could expect an apology from the teacher. "She said, 'Well I don't think that's necessary at this point,' " Phillips said.

After Phillips put a post on the instant-blogging site twitter.com about the incident, several of her friends got angry and alerted the news media. Meanwhile, Will Phillips still refuses to stand during the pledge of allegiance. Though many of his friends at school have told him they support his decision, those who don't have been unkind, and louder.

"They [the kids who don't support him] are much more crazy, and out of control and vocal about it than supporters are."

Given that his protest is over the rights of gays and lesbians, the taunts have taken a predictable bent. "In the lunchroom and in the hallway, they've been making comments and doing pranks, and calling me gay," he said. "It's always the same people, walking up and calling me a gaywad."

Even so, Will said that he can't foresee anything in the near future that will make him stand for the pledge. To help him deal with the peer pressure, his parents have printed off posts in his support on blogs and websites. "We've told him that people here might not support you, but we've shown him there are people all over that support you," Phillips said. "It's really frustrating to him that people are being so immature."

At the end of our interview, I ask young Will a question that might be a civics test nightmare for your average 10-year-old. Will's answer, though, is good enough - simple enough, true enough - to give me a little rush of goose pimples. What does being an American mean?

"Freedom of speech," Will says, without even stopping to think. "The freedom to disagree. That's what I think pretty much being an American represents."

Somewhere, Thomas Jefferson smiles.

Monday, November 16, 2009

A Boy And A Girl In A Bar

Saturday Night.

Setting: The crowd from a Rugby house party has moved on to a sports bar in the Lakeview neighborhood in Chicago. A boy and a girl are talking. He’s attempting to flirt. He’s bought her a drink. After several minutes of conversation, he thinks things are going well, she thinks he seems nice, but another boy from the party walks into the bar.

Girl (cutting him off from general bar small talk): I have to tell you something.

Boy: OK.

Girl: I kissed Joe the other night.

Boy: Ohhkaay?

Girl: So, um, I’m going to go talk to him now. (Girl walks away from boy)

Amy Anderson, awkward with boys since 1972.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

You say it's your Birthday...

My birthday is this coming Wednesday. Birthdays, for me, are a touchstone. They are a time to reflect on where I am in my life. I both love and hate birthdays. I mean, who doesn’t love cake? And gifts? And people celebrating YOU? I’ve been known to wear a tiara on my birthday. (The rest of the year I am not a Tiara kind of girl) And drink very large, very alcoholic drinks. Over the years photographic evidence is abundant of me holding a drink, smiling, wearing either the aforementioned tiara or a birthday hat.

My favorite birthday celebrations vary from my first slumber party when I was a kid to a surprise keg at my neighbors in college to my birthday two years ago when I threw myself a bowling party. I bowled in a short dress and tiara (and a vodka tonic in hand). And have a picture of the men in my family wearing hello kitty party hats. Now that’s a good time.


The thing that I hate about birthdays is the whole reflection on where I am in my life. Some years it’s been all happy with my job, happy with my friends, happy with my life. Other years it’s been what-the-hell-am-I-doing freaking out? (That was most memorably 29 and 30 and 31).


This year, well this year I don’t love my job, in terms of responsibility, challenges and salary, it’s where I was ten years ago. And on top of that, they cut me back to part time. And, well, that’s all weighing on me.


Looking over the past year, since my last birthday:


I failed as a waitress. I mean, I’m REALLY bad. I should never wait on tables.
Got deeper in debt.
Wrote less than I have in years.
Not kept in touch with people as much as I should, would like, need to.
Went on one, and only one date.
Gained fifteen pounds.


But,


I made some great, amazing, extraordinary new friends.
Solidified newish and old friendships.
Was weightless. Total, no gravity, floating in the air, weightless.
Flew a plane. (as in, I flew the plane.)
Had my second story published.

So, I guess, maybe, this past year was, like most years, good and bad. The lows this year were not as bad, at all, as past years. But also, the highs could have been higher. So, as this next birthday approaches, I guess, bring it on. I’m ready for the next year. Ready to challenge myself, ready to succeed and fail, and all that messy crap of life. And in the meantime, as always, I’m amazed at the people in my life who love me and support me and make it all worthwhile.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Who says things like that?


My VP came up to me and whispered "See those are not challenges you have to deal with"

I asked "What?"

He replied, "Babies" and walked away.

Friday, September 18, 2009

What kind of puff piece does GoogleNews think I am?

I don't know who GoogleNews thinks I am. But I don't like it.

Lately, all my recommended news articles are all fluffy entertainment gossip. So, all week I've been clicking on hard news articles about Iran, Health Care, Afghanistan, Wall Street. Ok and maybe a review of Glee. And Gossip Girl. But also G20, the Olympic bid. Oh, and Kanye.

Hmm, maybe GoogleNews does know me. Still, I don't like it.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

What is your definition of slow?

My VP: People complain that these old computers are slow, but you just have to be patient. You can't rush it.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Transference

Most mornings, when I’m too lazy to brew it myself, I stop at Starbucks. It’s not that I’m a fan of Starbucks (I think ya’ll know my favorite latte, where the foam is sublime), it’s really about proximity and convenience. It’s on my walk to the el.

Everyone at that particular Starbucks is great. They are friendly and cheerful (not too cheerful), they remember me and my order. They are efficient. They get the job done. And manage to not annoy me before I’ve ingested caffeine.

Except one barista. Who is nice. Who seems a bit timid. Who smiles. Who speaks in a soft voice. Who irritates me. Inexplicably, grates on my nerves. I feel impatience rising in me when I realize he’s the one at the counter.

This barista has never done anything wrong. Never messed up an order, never taken too long. He’s perfectly fine. I just, chemically, have a reaction to him that fills me with annoyance.

Then one morning I realized what it was. He reminds me of someone I once dated. Someone who, initially I thought was as a nice guy, and this was my attraction to him. I then started to realize, it wasn’t so much that he was nice, it was that he was passive. And nice, well, it is the path of least resistance. It is the easier, lazier, safer choice. His passivity quickly became repulsive to me. Which in term made me a bit nasty to him. Which made him a bit whiny towards me. Which repulsed me more. Do you see the horrible cycle?

He wasn’t a bad guy. But with him, I was a bitch. And generally I’m often too nice for my own good.

So this poor barista, with the soft voice and the doughy face, well, I’m trying to not be unreasonably annoyed with him. I mean, he’s not to blame for my dating past. But really, it’s too much to process before I’ve had my coffee.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Full time headache

Me: the last pay period was 10 business days. You paid me for 78 hours.

Payroll: you worked 78 hours.

Me: but I’m full time.

Payroll: you get paid the hours you work.

Me: why don’t I get paid over time, like when I come in on Saturdays?

Payroll: because you are full time employee.

Me: then why wasn’t paid for 80 hours?

Payroll: because you get paid for the hours you work.

Do you understand why I have a headache?

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

More from my VP's Office

While I was sitting at my desk I heard him to say to one of my (male) co-workers, "Turn around. Look at your butt. You and your butt."

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Things my VP has said to me:

"You know how women are…"

"Mr. (Blank) is too nice, we're trying to make him more like Amy."

"You know what they're like at that age." This was said to my colleague, who is my age.


Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Old school, like it’s 2004


Yesterday I experienced something horrifying. A day without my cellphone. It's such a naked, impotent feeling. The empty space in my purse, puffed out with loneliness, it's shape molded still from the missing phone.


No music player to play Andrew Bird or Calvin Marty and the Sunken Ship. No internet. No email. No facebook. No texts. No twitter.


I waited at the corner and actually watched the cars, saw the light change, did not cross the street with my head down, my thumbs active.


I stood on the el platform and looked around. People. People everywhere. Many without a phone. Without an iPod. I marveled at their electronicless wait. I thought, what do I do to entertain myself?


Then I remembered. I have a book to read. Wow.

It was like it was 2004. And I was back in NYC. Back when I didn't own an iPod, didn't have a phone with internet. Where riding the subway means, no internet or cell connection (Except inexplicitly when sitting on the 6 train in the station at Bleecker, I would randomly get cell reception)


Right. Books. I read books. I couldn't spend my train ride texting people, reading emails, twittering. Books. I happened to have a book in my purse.


Paper and words. Pretty radical, huh?


Then I remembered the horrifying and embarrassing experience of reading something emotional. That's always cool. Sitting on the brown line trying not to tear up too much reading Elizabeth Strout.


Of course, this morning, I remembered the phone. I listened to Colin Hay on my walk to the el. And read tweets and emails on the train. My book never left my purse.


Maybe on my ride home I'll kick it old school, like it's 2004 and read. Paper and words that is.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

What do an Eagle, Mr. T, Pirates and Ivy have to do with each other?


Last night, I had quite the inaugural Bleacher experience.

It started with me cranky and tired (as I am most days). Sunday, I spent too many hours drinking beers and cheering for the losing Blackhawks. Sunday was a perfect Memorial Day weekend. Crisp, sunny, full of sloshed jackasses (me included). But Monday, Monday I was exhausted a bit hungover and outside it was soggy and grey. Not a day (or night) that you want to sit outside and watch a baseball game. The kind of day when you want to sleep in and watch Tivo’d Hills episodes.

I was hoping the game would get rained out and that my girlfriends and I would grab a great dinner and drink a bottle of wine instead. Somewhere inside, where’s it’s warm.

But we dragged our cranky selves, complaining about the weather and commenting on our attempts to layer up and (for me) the decision to forsake fashion for warmth.

Living near Wrigley is both wonderful and horrific. When you want to go about your day and do simple things like walk up the street to a friends house or go shopping, it’s horrific to have thousands of drunk assholes from the ‘burbs crowding the sidewalks and the streets, vomiting on your doorstep, screaming to each other (or crying) on the corner. But, when you are in the mood for the game, being a part of it, it’s pretty great to walk only four blocks to the world’s largest bar, Wrigley Field. And let me be honest, I have been that drunk asshole crowding the sidewalk, yelling at my friends (maybe even crying on the corner). But I digress.

Wrigley, well, it sucks you in. We walked in the gates and Darcy said, “I wasn’t going to drink, but now that I’m here…” Yep, that’s Wrigley for you.

Here’s what was great about it:

· It was Memorial Day. I get a bit teary and emotional during the national anthem. Well it doubles on Memorial Day, especially when you throw a bald eagle into the mix. There was an Eagle named Challenger. During the last verse of the National Anthem he started a few rows behind us in the bleachers, circled the pitcher’s mound a few times and landed on the arm of his handler. I’m an emotional dork. I got teary eyed. It was pretty awesome.

· After Challenger’s performance, seagulls circled the park and Darcy said, “I know they are going to shit on me.”

· Mr. T threw out the first pitch. Mr. T. Seriously, Mr. T.
· The drama. Oh the drama in the bleachers. Overheard conversations: one woman telling another man that he and his wife should become swingers, another woman telling her friends that she connected with a former student on facebook and they are now dating.
· There was a couple making out. I mean full on sloppy drunk making out. Then they left, and ANOTHER couple sat in the same spot, and proceeded to make out. Oh and they also were kind enough to stand up at one point while they were making out, so that everyone could see better.
· British and Scottish Soccer (or in their words, football) players dressed in kilts with their faces painted. They were all ruckus and drunkenness, hitting on all the girls around us.
· Kelly kept mimicking and repeating the British phrases. She’s going to speak “British” this summer. I told her I think that’s “brilliant.”
· Mr. T sang the 7th inning stretch, finishing with “I pity the pirates.”
· The cubs lost, but that last inning they ALMOST had it. It was exciting. Except, well, they still lost.
· On the walk home, a driver in a car at the intersection of Sheffield/Clark/Cornelia was singing Opera, top of his lungs, full on Susan Boyle enthusiasm to himself.
Did I mention that I ate a hot dog and drank some beers? I maybe a vodka girl, but sometimes a beer is what’s needed.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

What’s been going on since I haven’t been blogging:

What I haven't been doing while I haven't been blogging:

Eating healthy

Getting published

Cleaning my apartment

Discovering a cure for cancer

Working out

Doing good

Being selfless

Updating my resume

Finding a better paying, intellectually challenging job

Fighting crime

Making the world a better place


 

What I have been doing while I haven't been blogging:

Twittering

Working my mundane low paying job

Complaining

Eating chocolate

Reading

Writing (some)

Drinking at sox games, in bars, during Wrigley bar crawls, at restaurants

Shopping with my tax refund and tiny paychecks

Watching too much T.V.

Becoming one being with my couch

Twittering


 


 

Friday, April 03, 2009

Riding the EL, Friday Fun, and my failed attempt at Missed Connections and proof that, Yes, I am a loser

This morning, on the el, there was a man who I thought was, well, a hottie. But, for me, the el is about commuting, not being hit on. That, and I am a big old shy loser, out in the world, when I don’t have a drink in my hand and I’m not standing in a bar.

It isn’t that often that I see someone on the street that I find attractive. Actually, it’s rare anywhere, not just on the street. So, this morning, I’m on the brown line, I see a cute guy. I am plugged into my iPod, I’m stealing some commute time to do a little work on a story I’m writing, so although I do notice him, I don’t make eyes at him or anything. I’m all plugged into my private world. But, again, I did think he was cute.

When the train stopped, I stood up and my iPod fell from my lap onto the ground in front of him. He picked it up and handed it me. I smiled at him and said, “Thank you,” and then rushed off the train before the doors closed.




Walking into the office I thought about posting a missed connection. I’d never done it. I’d never felt inclined to even attempt it. I used to read them occasionally, but actually hadn’t looked in awhile. It’s Friday, I’m bored. Why not?



So I posted this:


Title: I dropped my iPod (Brown line - Quincy stop)

browline...quincy stop around 10:30am...I stood up to exit the train and you picked it up and handed it me...I just wanted to say ...THANK YOU



And so far this afternoon I received two emails. This first one said:



Don't people communicate face-2-face anymore. Damn!


The second said:


oh god, PLEASE tell me that you at least said thank you when it happened and didn't wait to later post it online. that's really pathetic, if it's true. but if you did say thanks to begin with then that's cool... ignore me.




I’m not sure what I should have said, “I’d like to buy you a drink? I’d like to talk to you? I think you’re cute?" That wasn't my intention. I just wanted to reach out to a cutie on the train and say thanks. Or maybe it was and I’m just too wimpy, even anonymously online, to say things like that (when I am sober).


Anyway, this was my unsuccessful attempt at dipping my toe into Missed Connections.
So, I’m headed to Happy Hour where, with vodka in hand, I feel freer to flirt with abandon.

Happy Friday All!

Um, Yeah, OBVIOUSLY

Sex on Skates Opens Up to Tyra About Unsafe Sex4/3/09 at 2:53 PM

Why Levi Johnston would agree to give his first big talk-show interview to Tyra Banks we'll never know, but we're delighted he did. Because no other TV host — or, God forbid, serious journalist — would have the kind of conversation she did during an episode taped this week, to air on Monday. In it, she doesn't let Levi's mumbled, one-word answers get in the way of her prize: that is, an admission that he and Bristol Palin occasionally practiced unsafe sex, perhaps leading to the conception of their child, Tripp. (Also, Sarah Palin "probably knew" they were sexually active.) Here's a transcript of the brief bit of genius:
Tyra: I have to ask you a personal question, but you're on my "Tyra Couch" and there are no personal questions! Um, were you practicing safe sex?
Levi: Yeah.
Tyra: Really? Even when the baby was conceived?
Levi: We were.
Tyra: And so there was a wardrobe malfunction?
Levi: I guess.
Tyra: Yeah?Levi: Yeah?
Tyra: Really?
Levi: Yeah, I guess so.
Tyra: Every time you practiced safe sex?
Levi:Yeah.
Tyra: Every time?
Levi:Every time.
Tyra: Levi!
Levi: Most of the time.
Tyra: There you go!!
By: Chris Rovzar

(copied from Daily Intel)

Word of the Day: Osculation

What a scientific and boring sounding word …for something, one would hope, is not scientific and boring. (At least from one I can vaguely remember).

Word of the day:


osculation \os-kyuh-LAY-shuhn\, noun:


The act of kissing; also: a kiss.


He had engaged in nervous osculation with all three of Lord Flamborough's daughters.


-- Thomas Sutcliffe, "The art of seduction, the skill of the tackle", Independent, June 13, 1994


Their incessant onstage osculations during her last concert tour seemed to offer public proof of their passion.


-- "The Big Boom in Breakups", People, November 13, 1995


Osculation comes from osculatio, "a kissing," from osculari, "to kiss," from osculum, "a little mouth, a kiss," diminutive of os, "mouth."

Monday, March 30, 2009

Alcohol Lubricated Locutions from Friday Night


 

"Holy Crazy Sideburns"

"That's what happens when you a wear mock turtle neck on a date"

"I don't DO stupid." "Well, I could probably 'DO' stupid, but it would be hard." "It would have to be hard."

"I could do stupid but only for a limited run."

"I don't care, just get rid of it."

"Oh, I have more to say." "Oh, I know you do."

"Because I was hilarious."

"She said you forgot the rest of your outfit."

"I lost a bet." "What was the bet?" "There was no bet."

"Just as long I get the Tingo Taco Combo platter."

Thursday, March 26, 2009

word of the day: Propinquity

propinquity \pruh-PING-kwih-tee\, noun:

1. Nearness in place; proximity.
2. Nearness in time.
3. Nearness of relation; kinship.

Following the race he took umbrage at Stewart's rough driving so early in the day, and the propinquity of the two drivers' haulers allowed the Kid to express his displeasure up close and personal.
-- Mark Bechtel, "Getting Hot", Sports Illustrated, December 6, 2000

Technologically it is the top service among the women's fighting forces, and it also has the appeal of propinquity to gallant young airmen.
-- "After Boadicea -- Women at War", Time Europe, October 9, 1939

I was stunned by the propinquity of the events: I had never been in the same room with anyone who was later murdered.
-- Karla Jay, Tales of the Lavender Menace

Schultz came by her position through propinquity: her husband, older by 12 years, used to play music with De Maiziere and afterward chat about politics.
-- Johanna McGeary, "Challenge In the East", Time, November 8, 1990

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Couple things that have been bugging me lately.


Don't pee on the toilet seat. Really.


When you are in the ladies room, don't spray so much perfume, that I end up smelling like your perfume.


Drama. Can't we all just take a deep breath and relax?


You don't always respond to my emails or return my phone calls, so don't whig out when I don't respond to yours.


Please respond to my emails.


Wait for people to exit the el before pushing your way on.


Hurry up and get off the damn train.


Stop singing under your breath. You are not in the shower. You are not on a karaoke stage. You are sitting next to me on public transportation.


The el is not a singles bar. If I am reading a book (or listening to my iPod) do not repeatedly ask for my phone number or my email address when I have repeatedly and politely refused to give it to you. Also, don't bother giving me your phone number and email address. Drunkard.


Seriously. Take a deep breath. Everyone.


I hate phlegm. I hate mucous. I hate congestion. I hate my sinuses. I hate being sick.


I hate when I'm cranky. I hate when other people are cranky.


I like sunny days.


I like eating lunch outside.


I like puppies.


And dogs.


And kittens.


And cats.


And lattes. I miss drinking lattes. I wish I could still afford to drink a latte every morning. I miss making money.


Puppies are cute.



Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Word of the Day: Eclectic

1eclec·tic

Pronunciation:

\e-ˈklek-tik, i-\

Function:

adjective

Etymology:

Greek eklektikos, from eklegein to select, from ex- out + legein to gather — more at legend

Date:

1683

1: selecting what appears to be best in various doctrines, methods, or styles

2: composed of elements drawn from various sources ; also
:
heterogeneous

eclec·ti·cal·ly \-ti-k(ə-)lē\ adverb

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Driving in Morrocco

I haven't been blogging because 1. I've been hyper-focused on my jobsearch and 2. I've actually been working on other writing. So in the meantime, here is an old essay that was part of my thesis:

On a drive from Rabat to Marrakech, October 2002

Colorful stands selling pomegranates, apples, tangerines, eggplants and live chickens for slaughter line the highway.

Most public restrooms, even in the European-looking gas station, have two sinks and two stalls, the stalls equipped with a drain in the floor to squat over. Though Heather declares she has to go so bad she doesn’t care, she comes back to the car admitting she chickened out.

Driving eight hours from Rabat to Marrakech in a rental car that doesn’t have a CD player, to entertain ourselves we make up lyrics to the Arabic music on the radio. When the keening hurts our heads too much, we decide to sing American songs.

Problem: The combined musical knowledge of the three women in the car does not equal one complete song. At most the three of us come up with the chorus and half a verse to Neil Diamond’s Sweet Caroline.

Maps in Morocco: futile. Streets change names frequently and the locals are never are told the official names.

When asking for directions at a gas station, men gather, some from other cars filling up, some walking by. Strangers to each other, they sound like they’re arguing as they point at the map in our guide book. Even when friendly while delivering directions with a smile, Arabic sounds angry.

Told in Spanglisharabic to veer at the circle, we don’t know which circle or in which direction to veer.

Problem: There is a circle at every intersection.

Something curious: No left turns. To turn left you’re directed into a right lane that turns and somehow you end up left.

Marrakech, an ancient city, teems with Berbers and Moroccans as well as English, German, French and Canadian tourists. Three New Yorkers trying to maneuver a sedan through centuries old streets at night: not a good idea.

We realize sitting at a red light when a series of cars pause and then drive on that, after dark, traffic lights are treated like stop signs. Street signals become suggestions.

Since our hotel is inside the medina, we should have called ahead and arranged to be picked up; instead we attempt to drive to the hotel. Problem.

The attempt is complicated by street sign’s placement at the top corners of buildings and they’re in Arabic. We decide to give the address of the hotel to a taxi driver, offering to pay to follow him in our car until he finds our hotel.


Driving up to a line of mustard-colored dusty cars at the taxi stand, a collection of drivers comes to our window and argues over who will take us. Maybe it isn’t arguing; maybe it’s the Arabic.

As we drive down a narrow, winding street, donkeys and people hurtle out of our way and some pound on the car yelling. A young woman with kohl-lined dark eyes wearing a yellow djellabah spits Arabic at us and waves her hands in the air, for a moment we think that we’re back in New York.

Forty minutes of crisscrossing the medina following the cab driver, leads to worry that he might be setting us up for abduction. We wonder if we have made a rather large mistake.

The cab driver suggests calling the elusive hotel for directions. Giving him some Dirhams, we watch from our car when he makes the call from a pay phone.

Something else curious: There are payphones in Marrakech.

The driver takes us to a parking lot, which is really just the alley behind three buildings, and in disjointed English instructs us to park the car there for 15 Dirhams a day. Kara, whose name is on the rental agreement, worries something will happen to the car. She first resists, then panics. Eventually she acquiesces.

After explaining we have “beaucoup valise” and “mucho luggage,” a man appears with a cart. He tosses in our Samsonites and Touristers, then vigorously pushes the cart through crowds. Following him, we’re not sure where he is leading us and are nervous that if we lose him we’ll lose our luggage.

We laugh that we’re about to become a State Department statistic, but stop laughing when we turn off the crowded street and continue down an unlit path.

We hear the sounds of the square just on the other side of the walls, where there are food carts and snake charmers and acrobats, but we are a group of five slithering through the dark. I wish I could remember all of a “Hail Mary.” I get lost after “Blessed art thou among women.”

The cart stops suddenly, a little door within a door opens, and there it is, the lobby of the Riad Enija, a garden with fountains, birds and soft music.

The taxi driver refuses our Dirhams. He is a university student named Mustafa majoring in Mathematics. He smiles big when I take his picture with Heather and Kara, then gives us his email address so that we can send him a copy.

When shown to our room we find rose petals strewn on silk linens and Moorish tiles.

The three of us sink into the beds. Kara tells us that while talking to Mustafa, when he heard we were from New York, he grasped for his French, struggling to remember the word désolé. Kara tells us it means I’m sorry; he was referring to September 11th.

Through out our stay we are continually touched by how generous and kind everyone is that we meet.

We fall in love with Marrakech.

Saturday, February 07, 2009

Word of the Day

It was pointed out the me last night that all the vowels are all in order. I also like this word because I'm a smart ass(ie. facetious) Also, it sounds like feces. Really, I am a grown up. Sometimes.

Facetious
Main Entry:
fa·ce·tious
Pronunciation:
\fə-ˈsē-shəs\
Function:
adjective
Etymology:
Middle French facetieux, from facetie jest, from Latin facetia
Date:
1599

1 : joking or jesting often inappropriately : waggish 2 : meant to be humorous or funny : not serious
synonyms see witty
— fa·ce·tious·ly adverb
— fa·ce·tious·ness noun

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

I saw my shadow (and I wept)

Randomness to follow (mostly thoughts from the past couple weeks):

  • I love Obama. We know that I love Obama. I'm all about slurping up the Kool Aid. And I was pretty damn happy about all of his nominations. And then like dominoes, they keep falling. Weird, right, that Hillary seems to be the least controversial. Even with her husband cozing up to all those foreign nationals?
  • Apparently, Daschle and Geithner are on board with tax increases for the wealthy, because well, they just don't pay all their taxes.
  • And the pen, it appears, is pretty mighty. Or at least the editorial is.
  • The City is the worst show. Ever. And yet I'm watching it. There's all kinds of fabricated drama, I mean real drama, and yet it still feels slow. But it's quotes like this that keep me coming back "You know you can trust me baby." I forgot that guys actually say things like that. Oh and I love that Olivia Palermo is so stereotypically bitchy and snotty. These people have no soul. And I love it.
  • Blago-crazy - why isn't his PR firm writing his speeches? His rambling, pointless, emotionally, whiny plea to the Senate was, well, rambling, pointless and whiny. Did I mention pointless? And then the press conference in front of his house, that awkwardly wouldn't end. And he walked into the crowd and told some kid he would play ball with him sometime, and then continued to reiterate the fluff that he had already said. He's beginning to be like Starbucks. Enough already. You're on every corner and we're sick of you.
  • Karaoke in South Haven, MI is serious stuff. They should do an American Idol audition there. There is a man named Bob, who has his name on his shirt, and man named Charles who sings Ray Charles, and young guy who looks a little Kevin Federlineish who sings love ballads and never cracks a smile. It's serious stuff..
  • Damages is so great, Blair even referenced it on Gossip Girl. I'm so addicted I have to watch it at 9 and again at 10 to see if I missed anything. And I love that the main character is a tough bad ass girl who is smart, smart, smart.
  • My apartment needs a steam cleaning from ceiling to floor. It looks like an agoraphobic had a break down there. Or, I didn't leave my apartment and didn't clean up after myself for like a week.
  • I think my cat should pitch in and help me clean. Maybe scoop her own litter or wash a dish once in awhile. I think a lack of opposable thumbs is a poor excuse.
  • I love chicago. I hate Chicago. This winter sucks. I have a hit out on Punxsutawney Phil.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

25 Random things about me

It was brought to my attention by a step-3rd-cousin (I have a complex family) that I have been neglecting my blog. (His exacts words were "Ho, get off the street and back in the library")

So to kick start things I am sharing with you something I posted on Facebook. I was "tagged" in a Notes game of tag. You have to write 25 things about yourself and then tag 25 people and they then do the same. and So on. So here are 25 random things about me:

1. Lately, I've really been missing New York, A LOT but I'm not sure if I miss the city or if I miss that time of my life.

2. I hate carrots, bacon and asparagus.

3. Like Lorraine, I go through food phases. One three week period, I ate creamed spinach every day for lunch. Currently I'm going through a brownie phase. I'm hoping it will be replaced by something healthier.

4. I love coffee. I have a Pavlovian response when I even just catch a glimpse of a coffee cup. I love coffee.

5. Two summers (one in high school and one in college) I interned for Congressman Charlie Wilson (as in Charlie Wilson's War). There were three Amy's in the office so his nickname for me was Junior.

6. I have a cat. I love her but she is my secret shame. I don't want to be the cliche, but alas I am. But what can I say? She's a sweetie and greets me at the door.

7. I have never been married, but I have lived through three marriages. My mom and my dad's, My mom and my ex-step dad, My Dad and my step mom. And my mother asked me why I have commitment issues. I will say this, my dad and my step mom have THE marriage. If I get married I hope to be lucky enough to have the kind of marriage that they have.

8. When I was in high school, I hated my step mom. Now however she's one of the most important people in my life. She's the first person I turn to when I need something. I can't imagine who I would be and how I would survive if she wasn't in my life.

9. Like many people I too had a crappy childhood.

10. I'm angry at my sister for dying.

11. I love my family and get cranky if I go too long without seeing them. Although, I get cranky when I'm with them too long. I can spend three days with mom before I start whining like a 12 yr old. I can spend 7 days with my dad, step mom and brothers before we turn like dairy products. Once it sours, it sours fast. Still, I love them and love spending time with them.

12. I have at various times in my life had fake nails, dyed hair and a perm (not all at the same time, but some overlapping) At the moment my nails and my hair are all natural.

13. I have a book problem. I'm always buying them. I like to own them. To keep them. Its hard for me to go into a bookstore without spending 60 bucks. I loan books to friends but ask for them back. I'm a weirdo about books. I rarely re-read them but I still like to see them in my bookcase and remember them.

14. I used to have a shoe and a purse problem. Grad school poverty helped dim it a bit. Although I still own a lot of shoes, especially ones I never wear.

15. I really want to have a family some day. I always wanted to be my next door neighbors the Hamiltons (four kids - two boys and two girls). But I know that I am not ready to not only marry anyone but especially to parent anyone. And I'm ok if I never do. I've yet to meet anyone that I've seriously thought "This is the guy." And I'm not settling for good enough.

16. I watch a lot TV. I love cheesy shows (Gossip Girl, The Hills)

17. I am not licensed to drive. When I was living in New York my drivers license expired and I never got around to getting a new one. And now I have to take both the written and the behind wheel test again. For now, I'm all about the CTA.

18. The most consistent thing in life is my cell phone. I've had it since April 2000. It's the longest in my life that I've had the same phone number. It hasn't escaped me that the most consistent thing in my life is mobile.

19. I didn't eat red meat for ten years. When I was nineteen I stopped eating red meat in an attempt to be healthy, then on my 29th birthday I ordered a steak. I don't know why. But it just sounded good. Now I'm an omnivore.

20. Once in college, while I was bartending, I tripped and knocked over the cash register. It was a mess.

21. I get claustrophobic. It's not debilitating, but it's pretty bad.

22. I'm a night owl. When I was in grad school I did most of my writing late at night lying in bed. Sometimes I'd be up until 5am.

23. I'm an extrovert. I'd rather be out around people. I like crowded restaurants, standing at bars, walking through cities. I get energy from other people. But I go through antisocial moments. I hibernate in my apartment, turn off my phone, and don't leave my apartment for at least a day. I just want/need to spend time by myself reading, writing or watching bad tv about super rich high school kids.

24. I have the greatest Dad. He's "Adorkable." My biggest fear in life is disappointing him. Although, if you hear us talking to each other, I'm mostly teasing him about being nerdy. Underneath the teasing, I respect him the most of anyone I've ever met. He's a pretty extraordinary guy.

25. When I was in kindergarten I got in trouble for telling a boy to pull down his pants on the playground.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

What is hidden in my closet?

I am not an organized person. And I'm a shopper (at least when I am employed and have a paycheck) On top of that, I am a pack rat. I'm borderline a hoarder. Alright, maybe I'm not that bad. But, it's not good.

I have clothes in my closet that I haven't worn in over four years. I also took more than eight trash bags of stuff to salvation army when I moved out of New York over three years ago. And cleared out another three bags worth when I moved into my current apartment a year and half ago. And yet, I still have crap in the back of my closet that serves no purpose, except to hang on a hanger.

Once, in NYC, I took a little trip through my closet and pulled out a dress that I forgot I owned. My roommate at the time commented that maybe I should shop in my closet. She had a point.

When I pulled out my sweaters this fall I realized that I owned two cashmere, sleeveless, cowl neck brown sweaters. What? really? I meant it's not like a white button down or a black turtle neck. One of them was a Banana Republic purchase, the other a Marshalls shopportunity. I'm sure I bought them months apart. But still, wouldn't you think I would realize what I was doing? Shouldn't I know what sweaters I already own?

I changed my blogger profile pic. It's one I took last year when I cut off ten inches of my hair. I tried taking a photo of it to email it to a friend. Anyway, I noticed the sweater that I'm wearing in the pictures and I wondered, where the hell is that sweater now? Seriously. I have no idea where it is.

My roommate was right. I need to do some shopping in my own closet.

Friday, January 09, 2009

Blagorageous claims of the day


He's being impeached because he tried to get pap smears for women.

He is the reason some kid got a new kidney.

He could have saved the housing crisis, but The House stood in his way (and made things worse), so you know, blame them if you lose your home.

He has a Poem of the day desktop calendar.



and I'm just curious about this sentence:
"...let me close by doing something that I probably won't do much after this, but I feel like doing it again since I did it not too long ago"

What?

[Sweet blog - Suntimes]

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Making Noise in Public Library

I had to watch a lot of Sesame Street when my brother was young. Which is fine, except that we are eleven years apart in age, so when he was 2 and I was 13 I was watching a lot of Sesame Street. There was one bit that I remember with Grover. He was sitting on a mountain top wearing lederhausen and calling out "Echo" and listening to the return "Echo, echo, echo." During this time my dad was working at the American Embassy in Rabat, Morocco. We had a great Moorish styled home with tiles and marble and echoing hallways, as well as critters you find in a Mediterranean home. Especially gecko's. Not so cute as the Geico one when it crawls out of your bath tub spout. My brother, a fan of Grover (and his own voice) would sometimes sit at the bottom of the staircase and call up the marble stairs and the echo'y hallway "Gecko, Gecko, Gecko." Loving the sound of his voice bouncing around back and forth.

So, I'm back at the Public Library today and in the midst of the seemily normal people surrouding me who are also working on laptops or reading books and newspapers, there is a man standing in the staircase making "MMMHHHMMM" noises, listening to the acoustics and the sounds he can make.

I'm coming around to this whole Public Library experience. It is entertaining.

Roland Burris takes a break from the 3rd person

This is what unsettles me about Roland Burris, he kept beginning sentences with "Roland Burris."

I just have a hard time taking anyone serious who speaks in the third person.

The other thing, and well, this is bigger, he appears to be surprised that anyone would have issue with him accepting the appointment. If he had acknowledged that there is validity to everyone's concerns, it would almost feel OK to accept him as the appointee.

But maybe that's starting to crack a bit for him, today standing in the rain, he actually didn't seem surprised that he wasn't being sworn in, and for the entirety of the "press conference" (which was really more like a scene from Law & Order, with black umbrellas, rain and press surrounding the man on the steps of the gothic looking Capital Building) he didn't once refer to himself in the third person. So there's that.

Here's the thing, this is what I've been thinking about this fiasco:

There was an episode of Scrubs where Turk wanted to give Carla a gift, something personal to show her that he cared and that he got her, except he was a resident or an intern or some sort of quasi doctor and working all the time so he never found the time to go out and buy her a gift then he came across the Lost and Found box and inside among other random items was a pen. A beautiful expensive fountain pen. Carla liked writing letters so the pen was THE gift to give her. And she loved it and she loved him. Except one thing. After giving her the pen and her loving it, he discovers the hospital doesn't have a lost and found box. The hospital has a It's Been Removed From Someones Butt box. The pen doesn't seem so nice anymore, does it?

That would be the obvious reaction to the appointment. At least to me.

Monday, January 05, 2009

The Public Library Is Stinky

In an attempt to get out of my apartment (and you know bathe and get dressed) and take a break from my new obsessive news watching, I am blogging from the Chicago Public Library. Usually I go to various coffee shops. I have quite the knowledge of which ones have free wifi and which ones are loud, which ones quiet and who plays the best music. But in an attempt to be economical (because let's be honest, it's never FREE. I feel obligated to order a coffee or buy a bottle of water or a sandwich and before I know it, it's been a $14 dollar afternoon) I am trying out the public library. This is what I've observed so far:
  • It stinks. Kind of like a mix of B.O., new car smell and stale air.
  • There are a lot of people in here on a Monday afternoon. Recessionistas? Daycrawlers who work from home? Retirees? Who knows...
  • The seats by the window go fast.
  • It's a wackadoodle trip down memory lane sitting in a study carrel. I keep expecting to see Greek letters carved into the wood. Or graffiti referring to my sorority (or one of the others) as slutty.
  • I type REALLY loud.
  • Turning the page of a newspaper is a distracting sound.
  • People need to turn off their ringers. (and what is great is that if you don't, the sweet Asian lady librarian will come over and passive aggressively request that you kindly turn if off)
  • The guy sitting one study carrol over from me needs a cough drop.
  • I need to be able to gaze out a window and think for like hours when I'm attempting to write brilliant things.
  • Next time, come early and snag a window seat. (and bring a cough drop for throat clearer sitting next to you)

Friday, January 02, 2009

cryptic notes

As a writer (and in particular as someone with ADD), I do not always have a pen handy when I have an idea, so I have gotten into the habit of saving text drafts of ideas. But frequently I forget what I was making notes about. Following are some notes I made about story/essay/blog entry ideas:

  • Olive (no idea. Seriously, not one clue)
  • What would be innocuous? (again, who knows?)
  • Signs on Greenlawn (Greenlawn Dr was the street of my childhood home. But I don't know what I wanted to write about the signs)
  • An ordinary day (this one I do remember. How seemingly out of nowhere your perception of something changes.)
  • The backend of peoples homes (This is referring to the view from the el, but when I started writing I kept thinking of Denis Johnsons Dirty Wedding and nothing I wrote could compare)
  • Gaf (Irish slang for home. Not sure what I wanted to say. But I like the word)
  • Winners: Hairbrush and shoes (this one puzzled me for quite a long time until I realized it was referring to the bizarreness of our news that week..the Hairbrush was Blago's and the shoes were the ones tossed at W)